Friday, October 14, 2011

Brewers Got Hart… and Braun!

Okay, well, the Yanks season ended up being a total flop at the end. A-Rod didn’t look too bothered by the fact that he struck out to put the final nail in the coffin (again), and I’m still convinced the only reason he swung was because he didn’t want to strike out looking (again)- cuz then he’d be some kind of shithead, yah? The fact that they brought him back from the DL about 3 weeks too early should sit well with Yanks fans during the entire off-season.

However, despite what you may think, the Baseball season is not over! We’ve still got the final rounds of post-season going on! And it’s a KICK ASS POST SEASON!!! Many of you may not care, but there are plenty of non-Yankees Butts still playing amazing ball! Yankees Butts would now like to go on record and officially throw our endorsement behind the fantastic Milwaukee Brewers!

More specifically, we would like to get directly behind the fabulous Corey Hart, our Viking in RF. Corey would have no problem crushing one into the upper deck, burning your village, throwing you over his sturdy Norse shoulder, and whisking you off on his next adventure chasing Cod around the Atlantic. I wonder what kind of helmet he wears in the off-season? I had to be all sorts of stealth, taking pics of Corey from within the Bleacher Creature who repeatedly taunted him with their “Horse’s Ass” song during the Yanks/Brewers series back in June. Hart stood there and took it. Now, that’s a Viking!


And if Vikings aren’t your thing, maybe adorable Jews are? This is where the fantastic Member of the Tribe and LF Ryan “The Hebrew Hammer” Braun comes in. Opposite of our beloved Viking, Ryan wears his pants a bit on the tighter-side, and I’m totally okay with that. Ryan might be the most dangerous Jew since Hitler. “Oh, did you just throw a fastball at my head? Try to find someone to do your taxes this year, dipshit!” You should see that boy pick up a penny. L’chaim!


Good luck to the Brewers! Yankees Butts salutes you!!